Thursday, March 7, 2013

I don't need more toxic


“You don’t ever have to feel guilty about removing toxic people from your life. It doesn't matter whether someone is a relative, romantic interest, employer, childhood friend, or a new acquaintance — you don’t have to make room for people who cause you pain or make you feel small. It’s one thing if a person owns up to their behavior and makes an effort to change. But if a person disregards your feelings, ignores your boundaries, and "continues" to treat you in a harmful way, they need to go”. ~ Daniell Koepke

What do you think about the above quote? I agree with it 100%. At my age, I already have too many other toxins in my body and I don’t need another one in my head.

I am sure when we decide to end a relationship with someone, we naturally feel a little guilty. Did we do enough to understand that person? Is it me, not them? We are unsure if we are doing the right thing. I guess when you are constantly feeling unhappy around the person, it is a sign to you to remove this person from your life. If you have allowed enough time and find there is no change then it may be time to reduce your exposure. It is just like when you learn of a food that may introduce toxins into your body, you wouldn’t eat it. You would discard it immediately, right? Believe me, our souls need the same loving care and protection as our vital organs do. II'll give you a couple of examples in my life. The first was a woman that borrowed money, then never mentioned it again. In fact, she began to avoid me. When finally I brought it up, she acted resentful and angry as if I were being mean (and I had not been at all). In that case, I simply passively let her slip away, a direction I think she was going anyway. In my second example it was a friend that told me gossip story after story about other friends. So much so that I began to realize she was quite likely saying things about me. They were never flattering stories and always had an element of poor behavior on the part of the subject. In that case I found myself interupting her and trying to divert her attention to another topic. Eventuallly though I began to distant mysellf from her as she seemed to stay intent on indulging herself in the habit. Though unpleasant at the time, today I feel like I escaped from becoming toxic myself. It occurred to me that there is a difference between a little sin once in a while as opposed to becoming fully toxic. By a "little sin" I mean something like this. This is one of our favorite "sins".

Well ... maybe sinful but not toxic, so please don’t throw this away. Or me either. LOL!

Salted Caramel Cake



For the American Sponge cake recipe, please click on the picture. 

Note: just divide the batter evenly for three 6-inch cake pan.

Salted Caramel Frosting
Adapted from : http://www.mykitchenaddiction.com
(Makes enough to frost a three layer 6-inch cake)

Ingredients:
8 brandied cherries (Optional)
1 ½ cup sugar
1 ½ tbs water
90gms unsalted butter
¾  cup cream
1 1/2 tsp sea salt
¾  cup soften butter
4 ½  cups icing sugar

Method:
Combine sugar and water in a saucepan.  Heat over medium-high heat, stirring till sugar melts. Stop stirring when the sugar starts to boil. Let the sugar boil until it is amber colored not brown. Remove the saucepan from the heat, and add the butter and cream. Add the sea salt, and whisk vigorously until the caramel comes together.  Cool to room temperature.

Transfer the caramel to a large mixing bowl.  Add butter and beat on medium speed until light and fluffy.  Gradually add the powdered sugar, beating on medium speed, until the icing reaches a spreadable consistency.

Note: For those who do not want to divide the batter, you might have to adjust your baking time and cut the cake into three equal layers when it is completely cool. Here is a video to show you how to cut the layers:
video




30 comments:

  1. Good morning. I truly agreed with the above quote.

    I'm always curious with that salted caramel. Seen that in your blog a few times...but doesn't know the taste. haha.....is it salty yet sweet ? Interesting.

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    1. Exactly, it is salty and sweet and it is truly addictive.

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  2. Your cake looks so light and fluffy - gorgeous. And with salted caramel, very yummy!

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    1. Good to see you here again Bel. Long time:) Thanks for dropping by.

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  3. Even in Heaven, there were the good angels and the legion of bad ones. We can only pray that we have the best of friends that we can appreciate and will appreciate us. Life goes on...whatever.

    Your cake looks great. Wish I could have a slice now...

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    1. Agree. You want a slice of that cake, CAN CAN! Come to KL! hehe

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  4. Agreed with your sharing! Just move on ... without them! Thanks for the recipe!

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    1. Welcome, happy to share and glad you agree.

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  5. That is the perfect cake with a good cup of tea or coffee in the company of a good book or non toxic people! Its a must to stay away from such people...least we ourselves get intoxicated!

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    1. Can still include me in your non toxic company. Me no toxic, guarantee for 10 yrs, after that, may enter into second childhood, toxic or not, don't know. LOL!

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  6. Salted caramel anything is good for me! And I agree with you... I dont like to have "toxic ppl" in my life too. Life is too short.

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  7. The trouble is when toxin lives with us and we cant remove her from our life with society frowning down on us. Putting up with one is a torture. However, things have changed and the toxin is now neutralised! But the relationship can never be repaired.

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    1. It is good that toxin is neutralised. I think relationship can be repaired but it takes time and effort and the willingness to forgive and let go.

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  8. I agree 100% with ur quote....sometimes i try to just bite tongue n live with it but it just makes things worse for me!! I have put a limit line to those involved for sometime now n feeling much btr!! :-) nice cake....

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    1. Glad you are feeling much better now. A line is drawn and that's good.

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  9. Quay Po, totally agreed! We don't need toxic people around us. Best to stay away where possible. Oh, your salted caramel cake sure makes me wish I could have a slice!

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  10. I felt relieved after read your articles. I had the same problem last few mths and have a feeling of quilty to ended the 15yrs friendship which was really painful to me. Thanks for sharing

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    1. Jes, glad the articles helps to make you feel better. I can appreciate you feel uneasy to end a friendship of 15 yrs but if you have no choice and that is the only way to feel better, you are doing the right thing. You must not feel guilty.

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  11. No need for toxic people! However, there is definitely a need for a slice of the salted caramel cake!

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  12. Hi Veronica, it does take me a while to realise how to stay away from those people that carrying toxic. I couldn't feel better after that but somehow it's quite hard if those people are your family members! Anyway, it's best to have a slice of cake if you feel bad! :)

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    1. I know, it is extremely hard when toxic people are love ones and family members. In this case, if a heart to heart talk cannot change neutralise the toxin, it is time to get the toxin expel from your body, don't you think? Yes, when you feel bad, having a delicious piece of cake can definitely take your mind off a bit.

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  13. if one day i've turned toxic to you, let me know. Dont throw me away!! LOL!

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    1. I will definitely have a heart to heart talk before I "ta pau" you and throw you away!! LOL!

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  14. Agrred with the quote. Just ignore them...

    Well it is the best to have a slice of your cake. hehehe.

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    1. Oh, I do not think you can ignore toxic, you have to get rid of them:) After that, have a slice of cake to celebrate! hhahaha

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  15. Well, I'll be doing my detox soon! Tomorrow, really! so, yeah, definitely understand what you meant by removing toxic out of one's system. Be it a detox for your body or soul, I agree with you. It is an extremely good practice.

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